Best friends means...
Best friends means...

What does it mean?
What does it mean to have and be so close to them that it feels wrong to do something without consulting them first, because your opinion would only be half an opinion?
What does it mean to not know your plans untill you know thier plans?
What does it mean to have one person in the whole world who knows every single little thing their ever is and ever was everything they ever felt, said, heard, needed, wanted, had.
What does it mean to have someone when people see you separated they find it weird?
What does it mean to have someone where you both joint buy one of things because you both need it, you both need the same?
It means without her i feel nothing.
I feel about as big as a parasite and as lost as a grain of sand in the ocean.
One weekend.
One house.
Hey lush, have fun, it's the weekend.
We didn't do anything that wrong, yet we got the worst punishment.
The over reacted way too far.
And now i'm never to see or talk to her again.
It's like you took the saw and cut half of me off.
She thinks your the worst thing that ever happened to me.
A liar, a cheat.
Liar, Liar, It. takes. one. to. know one.
This is far worse.
You know me better than i do and now your being taken away.
I never wanted for this to happen but it has and i'll have to deal.
I'm sorry for everything.
Just forget me, it's that simple.
It's hard, i know, i haven't stopped crying all day.
And whats eating if it's not with you.
Our last concoction together.
I'll starve in protest.
And where is he?
Does he even remeber my name.
I haven't spoken to him in a week...and seen him?
Well over.
He doesen't reply.
Why doesen't he reply?
Nothing...Does he even read it?
When did it all change?
Why does it ALWAYS change.
And before i can make it better they leave.
I trusted it to be different this time.
It's things like this that make me scared,
Make me scared to make fresh starts and have happy times because,
because it ends up like this and i get hurt and they don't care and I miss it so much i don't want to do anything.
Just fall asleep forever.
Then i wont have to wake up and glue on a smile to keep everyone else happy.
Sort out their problems so their smiles fall on.
Please see me again so i can make it right.
I don't want to end up in that place again.
Just because of this...Two chairs.
We face eachother.
She smiles and tilts her head and gestures me to talk.
I vomit out the words, she passes me tissues she writes me in the book.
Then the next headcase knocks on the door and then it's like...She's never seen me before and she's just the doorlady.
Please she drives me insane and it makes me feel worse being in thier just, let me know it's ok.
I wanted to tell him something before he left.
It was my fult he went away so fast.
I wasn't acting like anyone who any decent person wouldn't want to be seen with.
I was just bored.
Wanted to pass the time before seeing him.
But have you ever wanted to tell someone something so badly, to someone you felt for so strongly, and have them walk away when your stuck to the floor.
Then have them seem like talking to you is the last thing on their mind and they're supposed to want to tell you too...just as badly.
Every minute is a minute away, less is more, exept when it comes to mistakes...How long is long? That depends how long it takes.
Face it.
This is what we're up against.
I just hope i was being silly and that he just hasnt had the time or the frame of mind.
Just want to hear his voice.
I want him to say it's ok, that it's stupid thinking.
It's a shame i don't think thatyou'll notice.
I was acting like such an asshole...I just saw his van outside her house and i was scared, i couldn't be nice or close to anyone for a while.
I was just sorting it out.
They're back together and i know what's going on.
I have to pretend i don't and that i forgive him and act like nothing happened and it did.
I'm sorry i took it out on you.
It's ok to be a distraction.
I enjoy having you on my mind.
But I don't want to have to worry that i'm not on yours.
And as for A&E
That was one experience that never made me want to go near that place again.
She says come on, come one, let's just get this over with.
It's easy for you to say.
Way to endure embarassment for life.
I never said i'de take this lying down.
But what's the point?
It's not worth...Get out.